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26 Apr, 04:18
I was using this DVD player almost 75% of my waking hours. Watching DVD's, playing CD's, I found that I slowly disconnected from reality. I had to go to rehab when the unit broke, I didn’t know how to function in my everyday life anymore... “The chip inside the unit is possessed by Satan.” Said my wiccan therapist. She told me to drawl a pentagram out of the bile of a large mouth bass then light 5 candles with an unknown origin and the color of tempered beige. You can get them at Big Lots. Once I made the pentagram, lit the candles and put the DVD player inside, we began the séance and chanting. The DVD player began violently shaking and smoke emitted from the power button. After this was all said and done. A dark angel appeared began to smite the unit. I have to say this was an eventful evening, I don’t know if it was worth $73.45, but I think I will get another.
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